Why this, Why now?

I'm in the middle of a process at the moment which could lead greater things (i.e. really having more time to dedicate to this project) and the above question was asked.  Beyond my answers of how interesting coupling and relationships and how it appears that about half of all marriages are ending in divorce, I have been getting back to that original yes that I said to this project in May. 
In May, I was about ready to get married for the first time.  I had been through the audition and callback process for a few shows and realized that I was no longer in a position to accept a role and that I needed to do something else.  And the old show and it's process still nagged at me.   Here I was, two different full length plays written, they just needed some rewrites and to be sent out again.  And yet, this particular story and subject didn't feel done.  When I went through the play, realized that it was not only outdated but it's style didn't resonate with me as it once did, I wanted to do more research and see where it took me. 
Beyond that call to revisit the old play came a flurry of feelings about the subject.  Dating.  Here I was, about to get married and yet all of my experiences up to that point didn't fit into the typical dating model.  Not a lot of my experiences fit into any models for that matter.  And that's what really drives me to write about this.  I can remember when the original show was being done, I was dating someone at the time who I thought was "the one" and what ended up happening in my life during that time was one of those earthquake moments.  Here I was, living the American dream, pursuing my dreams and thinking I was aligning myself with what the universe was offering, only to have it all smashed into my face.  And that's why this subject, in fact, most of my writing stems around the idea that we try to fit into models that society gives us and yet they don't work for us. 
I think about people who are dating right now.  And what models they're being shown (just look at TV reality shows about dating).  Isn't it 'blame the dater?'  That's why you're still single, you didn't do x, y, z and that's why you ended up ALONE.  Doesn't that suck?  I recently completed an interview with a woman who is a relationship coach.  I asked her what stands in the way of most of her clients in terms of dating and relationships.  She said that 99 percent of her clients think that men only want women who are perfect.  They believe in the media's representation of women and beauty and think that's what men want and they don't measure up so they can't possibly meet someone.   She also said that the men respondents aren't looking for perfect, they're looking for confidence.   She said that part of her process is to get women to put themselves first and realize that the men aren't looking for perfection.  In fact, that men like women because of their imperfections.
So why this, why now?  Because deep in my being, I was being called to look at and talk about life in a way that goes against what is perpetuated as being truth.   The truth is, we're all looking for love.  And we don't need plastic surgery to get it.   That our definitions are being molded by media and advertising that has nothing to do with anything in reality.  And it's something we need to talk about.  Or we keep perpetuating these ideas. 

So far so good

Completed a few interviews so far, mostly in person but have figured out most of Skype.  What I can say so far in this experience is much like internet dating.  You communicate via various web modalities, you send pictures, you agree on meeting at a public place and the 'date' begins.   The awkward starts of who are you and what do you do, what are you looking for, what sites are you on, those questions continue to be the ice breakers and then eventually it's more of a conversation and questions arise as we go along.     I will say that of the people I'm meeting in person, we've tended to have a longer conversation than my thirty minute rule.  Of course, if the conversation didn't go so well it probably wouldn't last thirty minutes anyway.  This week I'll be putting the shout out on Twitter for some of my online connections and see what happens there.  Onward!

Evolution

This week was very productive in terms of planning and outlying.  First, locally, the plan is to start to host some singles mixers and events in the next coming months as some launching points.  Secondly, the possibilities keep emerging with the web and different opportunities that present themselves.  I don't want to get too carried away but OMG this is going to be so much fun!!!!

The Old Script

So I thought I'd describe what the old project looks like.  If anyone is interested in seeing it, please email me and I'd be happy to send it to you.  There are 10 characters in this piece, reason number one to revise.  The stage is set with seven small cafe tables.  There are five women and three men in this piece.  The characters or interviewees were based on the interviews that were taken.  Lights up on our  our characters.  Tabitha, the Janine-Garafalo type gal, an RN with a pack a day habit, comes off tough bur her revelations gives us a softer and often painful insight into her toughness.  Irene is a type A lesbian who is looking for love in all the wrong personality traits, including hers.  Jennifer is a naive sweet thing, with a good heart and bad ideas.  Briana is your night-club hoping thirty something that needs to figure herself out before she ventures any further.  Sally rounds out the girls, no longer a girl herself but approaching her later adult years with a insiders knowledge of "professional dating."  Ken, a sort of Dwight Shrute without the arrogance, is not so bright of a bulb in the relationship department.  Joe is the married subject, wilder days behind him but with that wisdom he knows how to be a good husband and father.  And then we come to Andrew, the Stage Managerish presence that oversees the whole thing and guides the story along.  They all know they're being interviewed.  They all know what the subject is.  And what they reveal is telling, funny, poignant and sometimes just uncomfortable.  There are a male and female character that emerge and do some re-telling of stories.  And it's just way to long.  And way too difficult to stage, although I have already done it.  If you're interesting in reading it, hit me up. :)

Questions

Here are some of the questions that most people ask about this project:

* Are you going to use my stories in your play?  Maybe, if they're really interesting and fit within the story I'm creating.  However, there are a number of websites, novels, shows dedicated to the subject of dating stories so unless the story is really interesting, maybe not?

* What are you using and why?  It's more about the experience of meeting people and hearing what they have to say that will contribute to the creation of this piece.  I'm taking the pulse of what's going on in this moment and seeing what people are saying, more than retelling of stories.

* Where could I see this play?  This play will have a public reading in San Diego and will be broadcast on the web.  If you participate in the project, you are invited to the first reading!