Saturday, October 22, 2011

Want, Feel and Need

I've mentioned that I am doing a lot of research, reading blogs, interviewing daters, interviewing relationship coaches.  So if there is something that you come across and think it's relevant, please send it my way.   But a huge part of this is coming from an inner creative spark, from a place of feeling rather than intellectualizing. 
I recently found a few articles and have come across a new book that is on my must read list.   To sum up the themes around these articles would be to say that the assumptions on dating and marriage are still falling within views that are outdated or have fallacies that range from being uneducated or even stereotyping.  In one of the articles,  the author of the book was quoted with the following "All of this conjecture about the failure rates of marriage is based on the assumption that all black women want to get married. There is so much talk about how it is impacting their lives but no one puts anything into studying what they actually want/need/feel."
 I thought this was a huge observation.  Making assumptions based on statistics and assumptions about them takes out the very human factor of feelings, desires and even basic needs.  And because some of those needs have changed, so have our thoughts about what relationships should and shouldn't be. 

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